In 2 Corinthians 12, the apostle Paul writes about a thorn in his flesh that he continually asks the Lord to remove. God does not remove it; instead, Paul must rely on God’s strength and grace. I’ve been a Christian for 25 years. I’ve read this passage countless times. I used to think I understood and believed that His strength is made perfect in my weakness, but it’s only been in the past couple of years, since my fibromyalgia symptoms started to develop, that it became real to me. Paul writes:
And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:7-10).
The Thorn as a Metaphor
Up until recently, I always read this passage as being metaphorical. And unless Paul had a literal thorn wedged into his body, that is true to an extent. But I always read these verses to mean “anything that is bothering me and doesn’t seem to go away”. Don’t get me wrong, certainly I think that we can apply his words that way and they can minister to someone who is dealing with an issue that is more situational than physical. But I must admit that I don’t think I really understood the full meaning of this scripture until I had my own physical infirmity that I daily plead with the Lord to remove, and have daily continued in weakness.
When my symptoms first appeared, I initially went to the doctor thinking that it was something that would be easily diagnosed and treated. As appointments and tests dragged on, I found myself pleading daily for relief just as Paul did. I eventually began to grasp that I was dealing with a chronic illness that wasn’t going away. This realization was incredibly discouraging to me. Continual pain and fatigue for the rest of my life?! Ah, the true thorn in my side. Now I get it.
Finding His Strength
Since developing fibromyalgia, I awaken almost every morning wondering how I’m going to make it through the day. Sometimes my mind is so foggy an my body so heavy I don’t even know how I’m going to get up and get ready for work in time. So I have to pray for God to give me that strength to make it through the day. And you know what? He always does. His strength is made perfect in my weakness.
Now, reading Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians, I realize that experiencing fibromyalgia has been a blessing. It is only in weakness that I can really experience that God’s grace is sufficient for me. I can only experience God’s strength when I’m truly weak. For most of my life, I haven’t been weak. So I haven’t ever relied on God’s strength, which means I haven’t fully known His grace.
Taking Pleasure in Infirmities
Now it’s one thing to rely on God’s strength in weakness. But notice Paul said he actually takes pleasure in his infirmities. Pleasure? Yes, really.
It’s ironic that I never appreciated my health when I had it. Never appreciated the ability to spring out of bed each morning, get the work done that I needed to do, and then still have energy to do the fun things that I wanted to do. It’s just something I took for granted because it was always there. Now, on the good days I rejoice. After making it through a task I wasn’t sure I’d be able to, I give thanks. When I realize that I am free of pain and have some energy, I give praise. When His strength is made perfect in my weakness, I am more in the will of God then I ever was before. Consider these commands in scripture:
Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice! (Philippians 4:4)
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
Therefore by Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name (Hebrews 13:15).
His Grace is Sufficient
From time to time, folks at church will ask me how I’m doing and then tell me they are praying for the Lord to heal me. My husband, too, says he is praying that the Lord just takes the fibromyalgia away. And that’s fine. They can pray that for me all they want, and I’ll certainly be thrilled if God answers it. But for myself and my own prayer life, I have stopped asking God to heal me. I have just come to that place where I think God’s answer for me is the same one He had for Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you”. Instead, I simply pray for strength. No matter what is in the day ahead of me, and no matter how poorly I feel that I am able to face it, I know that I can.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).